What do the people closest to you like and dislike?

That might sound like a very easy, straightforward kind of question to you but most of my teenage business students would instinctively reply with "Dunno Miss"

Although I am accustomed to that response from teenagers, I was rather baffled when an au pair friend of mine was called while off-duty, by her employer. The GP needed my friend’s assistance with her 6 year old son who was throwing a tantrum.She called to ask "Can you come and help me because I don’t know what he likes?".

If this General Practitioner was a business woman, and of course in many places health is a huge business, how much would you trust her to manage your health? What assumptions would you make about her social skills and emotional intelligence?

Knowing what other people like is fundamental in building relationships and therefore your business success. If you know or can accurately predict what your customers will like and what they won’t like, you have a solid base for marketing your products.

Knowing and being able to deliver what others like is a source of power. The most successful business people are those that constantly please their customers by delivering what they like. They call this the "wow" factor, the delight experienced when a customer receives more than they expected in the added bonus which appeals to their desires rather than merely their needs.

How good are you at finding out what people like and being generous enough to give them what they want?

My guess is that your honest answer to this question will indicate your quality of relationships. The greater your capacity to give people what they want, the greater your level of attraction in drawing friends, colleagues and potential customers into your sphere of influence.

Start with the 20 people closest to you, or even 10 people closest to you. What do they like? When was the last time you did something that made them smile, laugh or feel excited? Would you ever find yourself in the shoes of the GP who could not control her son throwing a tantrum because she did not know what he liked? Of course not. Would you ever reply with "Dunno" when asked what your closest friends and family like? Of course not. Would you know exactly what your customers want and how to deliver that to them? Of course!

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